Last Post for Life of Merl

As you've all noticed, I've been very slow to post. This has been mostly due to all of the traveling and field work I've been doing recently. Anyway, Becky has moved out here with me so we've decided to make a new blog, Nuestras Aventuras. We promise to stay on top of it especially with all the great trips and adventures we have planned. We look forward to hearing from you. Thanks!

A 1-2-3 guide to male infertility

There are some people in the world who are inclined to produce the downfall of humanity by adding more people to the planet. We call these people "breeders". My wife (and even my own parents) is one of these people.

There is another group of people who recognize that almost every problem on this planet is in one way or another dervied from over-population. These people are the "Guardians of all that is Right and Just". I am one of these people.

So I am beginning to realize that the "breeders" can trick us Guardians by making all sorts of lies about birth control and sterility and we'd fall to their lies. To avoid this type of deceipt I've done some extensive research (i.e., I googled a couple of mildly related sites) to generate this simple guide to produce your own male infertility:

1) Start smoking. Yes I mean it. And I'm not talking about 1 or 2 cigarretes. Research indicates you need at least 20 cigarettes a day so dig out that lighter and get going, turkey! Remember, this is for the betterment of our planet.

2) Excessive alcohol consumption? Do you find yourself wanting a drink before noon? Well you better. How else are you going to get through that 6-pack before your next office meeting?

3) Heat. Time to pick up some boy's size speedos. Why not take a scalding hot bath every evening? And who thought thong underwear only looked good on women? Going commando? Not anymore. Now you're holding them prisoner.

4) Frequent intercourse. I'm not talking 3-4 a week. 3-4 times a day or even per hour. Yes, it may require some help from some outsiders and you may lose your house in the divorce but that's a small price to pay for knowing you helped to stop the total annihilation of earth.

5) Workaholic. Look your wife already left you and you're life has totally gone in the crapper. You might as well entirely give up on living a worthwile life and start working those 100-hour work weeks. Vacation and fun is for breeders.

Yes, I know it's asking for a lot but it's worth it to the see the tears in your wife's eyes when she still isn't pregnant as she drops you off at a detox center. Good for you!

Washington, D.C. Immigration Rights Rally

Well it took me 3 hours to get to the rally but I made it and I'm glad I did. There were tens of thousands of people on the National Mall calling for just rights for immigrants in this country. It was a great time. Here are my photos. Enjoy.

Superhero Creator

I almost never post twice in one day but I found this superhero creator, I created the above picture with it. One of the coolest things I've found on the internet. I hope you enjoy it too.

Back in action

Oops. Way overdue for a post. Had nice back-to-back trips to Puerto Rico and Nevada. We just wrapped up the National Cherry Blossom Festival in Washington D.C. We were supposed to have a demonstration for my Aikido class but we got rained out. It's too bad because I could have gone down to Alexendria for the National Tartan Day festivities.

My wife is moving up here in June so we're looking for a place to live in Maryland. Wish us luck.

P.S. Merl is doing well!

Back from Puerto Rico

I just got back from my 7 day trip to Puerto Rico, where I got to do some field work. Puerto Rico is an incredible place and it was great to work on my spanish (which has been upgraded from embarassing to awful). Click on this link to see some additional photos I took. Hopefully I'll get back there in April.

Real Men Eat Quiche

Before I forget how to make it, here's a recipe I've made several times, adjusted it, and came up with something I really like. The basic idea is that you can make this pretty spicy because all of the dairy products take the edge off the peppers. Anyway, feel free to try it out and comment on it:

Leek and Chipotle Quiche

Ingredients:

2 leeks, chopped
3 chipotle peppers, finely chopped (these are roasted Japalenos; I buy them in a can. They keep forever)
4 eggs
1/2 cup half & half (fat-free)
1 cup of grated mild cheese such as mozzarella
10-12 medium sized shrimp (optional)
1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper
pinch of pepper
1 pie crust

Directions:
Preheat oven to 325 °F and set the frozen pie crust to thaw. Cook the leeks and peppers in a frying pan until nearly cooked then add shrimp until done. Set them aside. Whisk the 4 eggs, then mix in the half & half. Put the leeks, peppers, and shrimp into the pie crist, cover with cheese, cayenne, and peppers. Carefully pour in the eggs and half & half. Bake in the oven for ~35 minutes.

A word on leeks: Leeks are a wonderful alternative to onions but require a little work. The outer and upper dark green sections have a rather unwanted flavor. Therefore, I always remove the upper section (darker green) of the outer 4 layers of the leeks and take and inch or two of the top of the top of what remains. Also, leeks are often grown in fine sand which seems to pervade them. Try using a cheaper knife you to avoid dulling your fine cutlery. To remove the sand from the leeks, simply place them in a bowl of water after they've been chopped and stir them around a bit. The sand will settle out at the bottom of bowl while the leeks will float. Who knew the principle of gravational settling could be applied to the real world.

Valentine's Day

St. Valentine's day is one of those days you're either go to love or loathe. This year I'm somewhere in the middle given that I'm ~2,500 miles away from my wife. Anyway, I've been thinking a little bit about love and the often immiscible relationship between men and women (no offense to any gays/lesbians; I'm sure there a plenty of issues there as well).

Anyway, I stumbled on this quiz on the Washington Post, where you can vote for the best Anti-Valentine's Day songs. I voted for Alanis Morrisette's, "You Oughta Know" because I was living with a female roommate at the time this song came out and that song provoked such as strong spiteful response from her I was shocked. Especially since the object of her scorn, Dave, had never even cheated on her. It was weird.

Here are some clever videos on Google video also related to love and are at least amusing:

Make you happy tonight - A music video by the Austrialian comedy trio, Tripod. Becky may have a few comments about this song.

Fear of Girls - A fake documentary about a couple of helpless geeks.

Machinima

Lately I've been checking out a couple of Machinima series. What is Machinima? I think wikipedia can sum it up better than I can, but basically it's making movies out of video games. The most well known series is Red Vs. Blue, created using Halo. Red vs. Blue is often quite funny but it's been around a long time a it's hard to get into if you don't know the characters.

Another Machinima series that I've recently gotten into is the Strangerhood, which is a relatively new series created using The Sims 2. If you'd like to find out more about Machinima, head on over to machinima.com.